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“Why didn’t I know this before?”

“Why didn’t I know this before?”

Here we are, at the fourth edition of the infinite possibility series. I cannot wait to share with you, yet another magical tool that will change your perception and help you to see brand new possibilities.


Time and again you must have read this word in most of my blogs, but what does this really do and what didn’t you know before today, that you are going to find out after this post?

Let me leave you to think about this word and all the emotions, thoughts, ideals and perceptions attached to it.

Do we judge all the time? Do we judge only those we hate? Do we also judge those we love? Do we judge ourselves the most? Is it truly evil to judge and be judged?

“Judgement is used to control people. People do judgements to prove they are right and everyone else is wrong”- Ruhanie

So is judgement evil or is it disempowering??

To do and be evil, you have to be unconscious and anti-conscious; and being in judgement is not being unconscious. It is being disempowering towards someone or yourself if you judge yourself. Don’t give judgement the unnecessary power over you that it doesn’t even have. 

Judgement has the quality of an adhesive, it sticks to you. Every time you make judgments about situations, people and attributes, you remove that from your awareness and the judgement remains stuck to you.

1. For eg: If you are continuously judging being in a relationship or relationships in general, you completely cut off your awareness of a loving relationship from your universe and all contributions relationships can be to you. So if there is a loving, kind man/woman who is willing to be with you, contribute to your life, you will not allow it to show up in your universe because you have already made a judgement about how relationships are done. The universe is busy proving to you that you are right to think that, by showing you people in bad relationships or attracting you to bad partners that make you think relationships are chaotic.

2. If you are hell bent on “I’m never going to be mean, I don’t like mean people , it is bad to be mean”. This is a judgement of a human attribute. You are sending a message to the universe, please don’t show me mean, cut it out from my life and my awareness. If you cut it out of your awareness the next time a friend/ spouse/colleague  is being mean to you, you won’t even realize they are mean. This also implies to you, sometimes we feel we are acting or being  normal but we often don’t realize we are actually being mean because it has been cut off from our awareness. Thanks to the judgement we have in place about all rights and wrongs about all attributes and personality traits of people.

Is it really working for you to cut out being mean or any other thing that you have a judgement about? What if you were willing to receive meanness? What if you didn’t cut it off from your universe? It would in-fact, allow you to perceive it beforehand and then you can make your choices accordingly.

Being in allowance does not mean you have to personify it or choose it, you have to just be aware of it and be in an “interesting point of view”. The next time someone is mean to you or when you get mad and want to be mean to someone, just say interesting that I feel like acting like that, what else can I choose here? I either have the choice to be mean or I have the choice to let it go. What will create more in my life? What choice will contribute to my life?

This concept remains the same for all negative judgements as well as positive judgements. I would like to clarify that negative and positive is also a judgement. So what is really right or positive? And what is really bad or negative?

3. Any and all statements are judgements. For example when you say , “so and so is my best friend” is this a question or statement ? It is a statement.

Why do we say this is a judgement?  Because you have believed and made it true in your head that this person will act towards me as I would act towards a friend. In other words we expect them to act according to our own perception of what a friend should be.

If we function from this judgement that so and so is a friend, will you ever be able to tell if they are going to come stab you in the back? We perceive being a friend to someone would mean we are loyal, trustworthy and we would never harm them so ideally why would a friend do that to me?

This judgement, that they are my friend, is keeping you from having that awareness of them being mean towards you. With more awareness comes more choices.

If you are truly aware of the person and have no labels or judgements for them, you will never be on the receiving end of bullshit. You will always have an awareness of their intentions and then you can have more choice about your actions and behavior towards this person.

Instead of making statements you need to ask questions. Questions open up possibilities of different choices, hence it is not a judgement. You can ask “Who is this person going to show up as today?”

You allow the person to show up as it is and allow yourself to be aware of who they have decided to show up as today.

why didn't i know this before

Being in the question is one of the first tools to create a greater life. Allow yourself to introspect after reading this piece and be aware of all the statements and judgements you have in place. And how losing it all, one by one, will expand your life exponentially.

Do  not get hypersensitive to everyone around you for judging. Not everyone comes from a point of view of judgement. There are people who merely just make observations. Now you are wondering how the hell am I supposed to know the difference between observations and judgements. It’s simple, if it sticks to you and there are intense emotions attached to it (feels heavy) it is a judgement. If it is a thought that passes by you (feels light) it is an observation. It doesn’t affect you or your mood, it is just an awareness that you have about a person’s behavior etc.

Please do not try to change people around you after reading this. You cannot choose anything for anyone. You can only choose for yourself. Choosing or imposing a choice on someone else about the things you think will help them is being disrespectful to them. It is like telling others that you know better than them and that is being unkind. You allow people to choose and grow at their own pace. You can definitely exchange some learnings but leave it up to them to choose to act upon it.

“Don’t try to choose for the world, choose for yourself and see the world change around you” – Ruhanie 

How many judgments are you using to choose the limited life are you choosing? Will you now destroy and uncreate all that times a godzillion? Right wrong, Good bad POC POD all 9 Shorts boys and beyonds.  (To know more about the clearing statement click on the link).

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