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Busting 8 myths that can ruin your life!

Busting 8 myths that can ruin your life!

Ever thought about what could possibly mess things up in your life over and over again? Let’s bust some popular myths that limit us and our realities. 

Dive right in  ! 

 1. Your  past/ future is  relevant

A lot of us reference our present and future, from our past. We are always taught that we are a sum total of our past. But is it really relevant to your present? Does it truly define you and your life? What if you could choose and create something new everyday, instead of going back to your past and referencing your choice from that experience or situation? In reality nothing is really relevant unless you make it significant. What is relevant is living in the present and choosing what makes you feel light and joyful.   

Start with keeping your past where it belongs and start making choices that feel light in the present. Rather than having the perfect plan laid out and choosing from that limitation, try choosing what makes you feel light today and see your life unfold in mysterious ways. 

2.You  are your given  roles  and identities

You may be a mother/father, sister/brother, friend, nice/nephew, uncle/aunt, wife/husband etc. Is that who you truly are? Or is there something more to you than just that title? These are just roles we play, we don’t need to lock ourselves into being that all the time. We can choose to do many things and have fun with that. If you lock yourself up in that role, you just function from being that one person. A mother will never be able to think and choose anything else, except from the point of view of a nurturing mother. Will that create more for her? If you are so attached to who you “are ” or the “role” you are playing, you lose part  of  yourself  when your  circumstances  change.  What  if  you  were actually  an infinite  being  that  could change  at  any  time  and actually  recreate themselves  at  will  and choice.  This sounds weird and abnormal, but have you thought how much you could create, if you could play all these roles and yet not be defined by it? 

3.Experts are always right and we MUST follow their advice.

Intuitive intelligence is very important, especially if you are on a spiritual journey trying to find the right path. With intuition you must practice intellectual evaluation. Trusting something at face value without trying it and experiencing the positive effects on oneself can be very dangerous. 

You always know what is right for you. How can anyone tell you anything otherwise? They can definitely guide you and share their experience/ knowledge and skills,  but the true knowing always comes from within. 

 This  is  not  about  refusing to get your  car  or  computer  repaired when that’s  required,  or  consulting the doctor if you’re sick.  It’s  about  always trusting your knowing and awareness rather than getting validated by anyone else. We usually shut that tiny voice inside us because we are taught to believe that everyone who is an “expert” knows better than us, which has often led us to face setbacks. 

  The reason for the doubt stems from instances in our childhood or early growing years, where we must have been ridiculed for questioning an expert, or for asking too many questions. Many  of  us  did know  what  was  true  for  us,  but  had it  bred,  beaten or ridiculed  out  of  us.    What  if  you  were willing to reclaim  that  capacity? What  would  your  life be like if  you never  made  anyone the “expert”  of your life again? 

busting 8 myths

4.You are responsible for helping everyone 

How  much  of  your  life,  energy  and time  could you  free  up  if  you  were willing  to give up meeting  other  people’s  needs? Do you really have to go to a vegan restaurant just because your  brother turned vegan  last  week?    Does  the  family always have  to go out  together?  Are there other possibilities?    Asking questions  can open the  door  to different  possibilities. Once we see  that  “needs”  are just  a creation,  it  becomes  much  easier  to choose. It is important to keep in  mind that you  are here to be the  greatness of  you,  not  to live another’s life. 

We are working on autopilot and we seldom say no. It is like we are tuned to society’s rights and wrongs and we function from all the limitations rather than possibilities. Every time someone asks you to do something for them, is their need really valid? Many people assume that it is your duty to do something for them, especially our loved ones. Haven’t you had someone tell you “if you love me you can do this isn’t it?” Oftentimes people use their “needs” to manipulate others.  This is different from true need, which could be for e.g. a car accident and someone asking for help and even emotional needs which require genuine change. You have to decide whether this is a true need of a person or are they holding you responsible for their emotional well being by ways of control and manipulation? 

There is an old phrase which reads:  “Poor  planning  on your  part  does not  constitute  a crisis  on  my  part.” The interesting part is that you have to choose, whether you choose to meet the needs of everyone or you choose not to.   

5. Consistency  is a virtue and symbol of  maturity and stability

Ever heard someone tell you, you are indecisive? You can never stick to one job  or you can never keep friends for long? Has anyone called you immature for making so many different choices?

And voila! With society’s pressure to be “normal” you end up being consistent in a  job/ relationship just to find out you are so miserable in it.

 Being consistent is like locking all your imagination in a box and not allowing any other possibility to show up for you. Life keeps changing,  and presents us  with new  possibilities.   Why  would you  not  take  advantage of  that? Let’s look  at  an example: Suppose  a  child  starts  drawing  with only  three  colors:  red, green  and  blue. She paints the whole picture only with those colors and suddenly finds more colours like purple, orange, pink etc. The teacher stops her and says “how dare you be inconsistent?”. You need to use the same three colours for everything. Can you imagine how the picture would look if she used all different colors instead of only three? People want to perpetuate consistency as a way of controlling the outcome. They are fearful of the unknown and what the other choices could create for them so they don’t even try. 

Consistency is like death to be honest. It doesn’t allow you to explore to the fullest, it locks you into the same choices which you will probably make all your life. Being consistent will win you brownie points from everyone because that is what they do and know, if you try anything different they will be scared of you and how much you can really create. 

 

6. You are your thoughts , feelings and emotions! 

“ I am not the body 

I am not the thoughts 

I am not the emotions 

I am not the feelings 

              I am the Soul”  – MCKS 

Your thoughts, feelings and emotions are a creation of your physical mind. Your mind is an instrument through which our thoughts are formed and emotions felt. Has anyone judged you for how you think and how you feel? But does that truly define YOU? When  we identify  with our  thoughts, feelings  and  emotions,  we set  ourselves  up  for  being  hurt,  being blamed,  blaming others, demanding  and  giving countless  reasons  and justifications,  analyzing everything  to death and generally  not  being present. 

Thoughts, feelings and emotions drive us away from being aware and being in the present. It really has nothing to do with you or any other person, unless you want to be influenced by them. They are the lower frequencies of perceiving, knowing and being. When we function from perceiving, knowing and being, you start creating magic in your life. 

7.Quid pro quo  

An eye for an eye! Do you believe that you need to return a favour if someone did something nice for you? Do you feel the need to give a gift to someone if they gave you a  gift? If you are always looking to even out the score with someone, you are always in reaction mode rather than creation mode. How much would that contribute to you? 

If you receive a gift be grateful and in receiving, rather than getting into the energy of obligation. There is no tit for tat, only acknowledgement of the greatness of each person and the moment. This is the same for receiving meanness. What  if  you  could acknowledge a person being mean to you as: “Wow,  that  person is really  mean”,  and you don’t take it personally, say ‘interesting point of view’ and just go on with your life? Without trying to even out the score?  How  much  ease  could that  create in your life?

8. Your life is an effect of external forces

It can be easy to judge others, circumstances and blame an external force for our misery. We feel that it is not our creation and everyone else is to blame for where we are. Well, the bad news is , it is not true. We create everything in our life. The good, bad and ugly. Each and every choice, question and energy that we connect to, has a consequence and the consequence whether good or bad decides whether it was a good choice for you or not. 

The good news, however, is that this awareness brings us out of the victim mode and puts us in charge of our life. If we are still in denial that we are not the creators of our life, then we are just like the beach ball getting thrashed by the ocean waves, clueless. What a pathetic  sight! 

Doesn’t it seem exciting to know that if you could create this horror movie, you are also capable of directing a nice romantic movie?   

This also helps in quitting the blame game. Every time  a person is nasty to us, instead of “they hurt me” we can think to ourselves, is this even true? It is probably who they are and probably has nothing to do with me? This can save you from a  lot of emotional distress. It doesn’t make you an effect of other people’s emotions or thoughts. And puts off the victim role that we usually wallow in. 

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Shabbir

    Fantastic I read your blog it shows the way to live your life

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